Who Even Am I Anymore?
You look familiar. Have I seen you before? Oh, right—you’re that young, wide-eyed woman who loved people, thrived on adventures, and could talk the ear off a stranger in the grocery store checkout line. You were full of curiosity, always saying “yes” to life.
Fast forward to today… and you’re running on 3–4 hours of sleep, glaring at your husband because he had the audacity to chew too loudly. (Seriously, why must he breathe so aggressively?) Your emotions? Let’s just say you’ve developed six new personality types, and none of them asked for permission. You’d rather be alone than at a crowded event, and your friend circle has shrunk down to a cozy little triangle. The slightest thing sets you off, your moods are like a rollercoaster designed by a drunk engineer, and honestly—you’re starting to wonder if you’re losing it.
Perimenopause: Nature’s Plot Twist
Perimenopause is no joke. And honestly, it should’ve been covered in high school sex ed! Right after the condom demo, someone should’ve stood up and said: “Oh, and by the way, ladies, when you’re older your hormones will pull a disappearing act, your body will rebel, and you’ll feel like a stranger in your own skin. Have fun with that!”
One day you’re living your best life—working, raising your family, feeling confident—and the next, you wake up and suddenly:
- The scale won’t budge.
- Your job feels like a soul-sucking vacuum.
- Your family swears your picture is beside the word “nag” in the dictionary.
- Your body can’t decide if it’s the Arctic or the Sahara.
- And you forget… literally everything. (Keys, days of the week, and sometimes your own name.)
It’s frustrating, scary, and overwhelming—like being gaslit by your own hormones.
Hot Flashes or Spontaneous Combustion?
When perimenopause hit me, it felt like I’d been plowed down by a freight truck. My body hurt more than usual, hot flashes made me feel like a rotisserie chicken, and then I’d swing straight into Arctic freeze mode.
My vision blurred, my head pounded, and my stomach decided every meal was an express ticket to the bathroom. On top of all that—I felt completely alone.
Doctor Google Wasn’t Cutting It
I finally talked to my doctor about hormonal bloodwork. The results? They claimed I was postmenopausal. Which would’ve been fine, except… I hadn’t gone the full 12 months without a period. (So apparently, even my test results are confused.)
After talking it through, my doctor and I agreed to try an HRT combo patch. Honestly, it wasn’t my dream option—but it was something. A lifeline.
The Patch, The Myth, The Lifesaver
Fast forward a month and a half later: I’m sleeping again (hallelujah), the side effects calmed down, and I actually feel good. I’m not saying I’ve got it all figured out—but at least I don’t feel like a possessed version of myself anymore.
For now, I can confidently say: this was the right choice.
Final Thoughts (a.k.a. Don’t Mess With Me, Hormones)
Perimenopause may have knocked me flat, but I’m still standing—just with:
- A smaller social circle
- More hot flashes
- And the ability to terrify my husband with a single eyebrow raise.
Take that, hormones.
T 💜
Healing, Adventures & Simple Joys 
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